Base camp - The Waiting Game

Waiting for the weather window feels a lot like Groundhog Day. The weather is generally the same every day (blue sky, sunny), we eat meals daily and regularly at 8:30, 12:30 and 6:30 every day, and conversations generally revolve around the summit window, or summit day generally or the ever popular weather forecast. Somehow these conversations always degenerate into one or another toilet joke or a ‘silent but deadly‘ fart by a member of the team where the next 20-minutes are spent arguing over ‘who-dunnit’.

Base Camp - Salted Plums and the Condiment Challenge

Spare yourself no illusions that we are heroically trudging knee-deep through a steep snowy slope in the Death Zone of Everest, clinging onto our jumars with clenched teeth, breathing each breath as if it were our last… Oh no. Rather, the greater proportion of us are laying in our tents, completely bored out of our rapidly shrinking hypoxic brains for the 5^th day in a row.

The days have started to run together and the ‘time warp’ that we are currently stuck in has begun to affect our mental capacities. Last night we hit a worrying climax at dinner when the ‘Condiments Challenge’ took an interesting twist.

Base Camp - Birthday Celebrations!

I’m fairly sure that I won’t be starting too many birthday celebrations bathing in a ¼ full potato pan in the vestibule of my Hilton of Base Camp tent…but regardless, a wonderful way to start my 35^th birthday. The first proper wash in quite sometime, with an end result that would definitely be a contender for a ‘Head and Shoulders’ commercial (not Herbal Essences as I‘m sure that would alarm the boys!!). My usual clothes smelling ritual (eg. Going through my kit bag to see what smells the least) was also avoided as I decided to treat myself with a clean(ish)wardrobe and a fresh coat of lip gloss before heading to breakfast.

Everest Base Camp - Partying Russian Style

Last night we went to a party. Not just any party. An Everest Base Camp Party. Russian style.

Drama at the North Col

“North Col calling ABC over; North Col calling ABC…” the radio in the mess tent about 10 feet away from my tent at ABC crackled to life. I checked my watch - 6:45am. Crap. An unscheduled call that early in the morning meant problems. Looking up at he dark shadows on the roof of my tent I suspected that the evenings heavy snowfall and accompanying winds had something to do with it..!

North Col - What the brochure doesn’t tell you

I woke up with the condensation from the inside of the tent dripping on my head. Confused, I checked my watch - 6:00am - and tried to get my bearings. I was inside a tent. In spite of what felt like Chinese water torture, I was warm and relatively comfortable even though my thermarest had slid from under me during the night and now formed what looked like a bright yellow version of the Great Wall of China between my still comatose tent mate Chris and myself. 

North Col Acclimatisation Ascent

I smiled confidently at the dull thud of my crampon kicking into the well-packed snow and grunted in a rather un-ladylike way as I slid the jumar up yet another foot on the icy face of the North Col. The ultimate goal of today’s mission was to reach the top of the 500m ice face and spend 2 nights sleeping at the North Col. From there we were to make our way up to the 7500m ‘marker’ and then turn back to complete our final altitude push and preparation for the tremendous challenges ahead.

The rest of the group had already gone up the previous day but under the leadership of Chris, our guide, Nick, Jason, Stephen, Salam an I had decided to hang back at ABC an extra day to give those suffering from various tummy bug’s and coughs some additional time to recover. Unfortunately not all of the coughs and tummy bugs subsided, so on that morning, Chris, Nick and myself made up an intrepid group of three, braving the elements and, with each heavy, plodding step, further committed ourselves to the adventure ahead.

The journey up the steep, icy face of the North Col, begins with a 1 hour ‘walk’ over some rocky moraine from ABC to ‘Crampon Corner’- a ‘meeting point’ where climbers collect and deposit their crampons, harnesses and gear in big blue barrels strategically positioned at the outer perimeter of the Rombok glacier. Inevitably your crampons and harness - or anything that you urgently need - will ALWAYS be at the bottom of the barrel and will ultimately add an additional 20 minutes of ‘prolonging the inevitable‘ (otherwise known as faffing) - something that I have managed to get quite good at.

One can easily get to Crampon Corner wearing hiking boots but crampons are necessary in order to make the crossing from Crampon Corner over the cravasse packed Rombok Glacier to the headwall of the North Col. Navigating the icy glacier takes about 25 minutes, leaving you to stare up at the giant wall of ice, the obstacle for the next 4 hours, with a sense of both awe and dread. Normally, the entire ‘journey’ up to the headwall of the North Col is fairly uneventful, the biggest challenge involving jumping a few gaping blue crevasses and figuring out how to use the ‘self timer’ on a camera to get in a few token photos...

On this particular day however an additional level of complexity was provided by the blistering heat from the sun and radiation from the snow. It was absolutely sweltering and a bikini would not have gone amiss (apart from the obvious cultural ramifications!!). As I walked from Crampon Corner to the headwall I felt as if I was a ‘boil in the bag’ meal in my uber -girly pink gore-tex jacket and it felt as if the energy was being sucked out of my body by the heat with every step. Had we been planning a day at the beach or a day of tanning the conditions would have been perfect… (given my sunburn track record this option was quickly scrapped!!!). As I had already learned the hard way, the sun provided additional threats and challenges - sunburn, heatstroke, dehydration, radiation off of the ice and snow, snow-blindness and it also served to add an additional element of physical exhaustion to what was already a challenging climb.

With a ‘chilled out’ Canadian outlook, Chris and I ambled our way at a leisurely, relaxed pace up the North Col. It was a fantastic and thoroughly enjoyable ascent (I NEVER thought I’d say that!!) because (1) the ropes were incredibly quiet (we could have been anywhere!); (2) in spite of the heat the weather was fantastic; (3) because the snow was packed down it was easier to find purchase and move along the ropes and finally; (4) it was nice to take things slow and steady enjoying a long lunch (and a Baby Bell cheese!) whilst clipped to an anchor to break up the day. The gaping blue cravasses didn’t even phase me!

I was feeling strong well into the initial 3.5 hours of the journey - step, step, breathe, slide jumar up; step, step breathe, slide jumar up….. Every few metres I’d look around, smile and sigh happily and take in my surroundings - a brilliant blue sky, my fantastic team mates below, the giant wall of ice and snow with Everest looming ominously to my left. It was an awe-inspiring yet daunting sight.

That feeling of strength eventually began to dwindle. Heading into the final section of the climb I began to count down the steps and breaths to the comfort of my tent. Unfortunately we (I) had one major obstacle to contend with… a double aluminum ladder angled at 45 degrees and straddling a giant blue crevasse that would easily transport one on a rapid journey to the centre of the earth. Chris assured me that it would take me directly to Canada which was fortunate since I was craving a donut and a Tim Hortons coffee. I managed to ‘clip into’ the rickety ladder and make it across without any dramas. I did my best to ignore the fact that the only thing that was stopping me from a complimentary journey to the centre of the earth was a 3mm ice ledge, some 6mm cord and some high altitude, hypoxia induced Chinese engineering…. After crossing the ladder I nearly turned to ‘High 5’ Chris but then realised that it was neither the time nor the place…. Plus, I needed to maintain an image of mountaineering prowess in spite of the sweat, white knuckles and carabiners clipped into anything and everything in sight.

I won’t go into detail about the final 5 minutes of the ascent to 7000m except to say that when I finally saw the North Col camp I was soooo relieved. An oasis of orange in a sea of white. I was so tired that it seemed to take every ounce of will-power to put one foot in front of the other and I managed to muster about two steps at a time. Of course, in true form, as soon as I saw Zac and the rest of the team sitting relaxed and bronzed around their tents I was all smiles and all sense of exhaustion was quickly forgotten.

That night, reflecting on the experiences I’ve now had on the North Col I composed the following letter while Chris attempted to prove ‘best-tent-mate-in-the-world-status’ boiled the water for our boil-in-a-bag extravaganza…..

Dear Everest NE Ridge Tourism Authority,

Pursuant to last years correspondence, please accept this letter as my proposal for some significant developments for the commercialisation of the NE Ridge of Everest. I hereby whole-heartedly support the building of a high-speed escalator from Base Camp to ABC. I hereby also support the installation of a tow-rope from ABC to the headwall of the North Col (with snack bar selling sausages and waffles at Crampon Corner as well as crampon fitting service and massage bar). Please also consider this recommendation to build a heated gondola from the headwall up to the top of the North Col where an Everest themed bar with some lively, up-beat music would not go amiss. A zip-line can be installed for those with a stronger constitution. I would be happy to recommend some experienced Canadian commercial operators (look to the resorts in Western Canada as evidence of our engineering prowess) who would be delighted to help you with this project. Please do not hesitate to contact me with any questions or concerns. Thank you in advance for your consideration.

Kind regards,

Heather

Picture: North Col Camp